Shopping pit stop

No female, skinny, half pints here! We're doing it the proper way. At the Phoenix. Watching the handsome English men dropping in one after another. We have been smiling non stop since leaving the plane. And of course the shopping is hot hot hot!

Reunion in London

Lunch with Little B at our old South Ken favourite. Just the way it should be.

What does your name say about you?

The individualism is reflected everywhere, not the least when it comes to names. The more unusual name, the higher probability for an individualistic child. Who would want their child to be Anna Three or Johan B in the class? At least that's how some parents seem to reason.

Parents who don't trust their own common sense and intuition can always employ a professional nameologist. All you need to do is to list the qualities and personality you wish for your baby and pay $150. Then you get a list of names which will support and promote the desired personality. Easy!

As a result I suppose that all the angry, nasty, mean, lazy and evil names will be exterminated. Whatever they are...

Chic cocktail

The hype around Sex and the City sees no end. The booze industry takes the opportunity to boost sales in time for the premier. According to a trusted source (InStyle), apparently there is now a Carrie drink. This is how you do it:

To toast Carrie, shake 50ml Skyy Vodka, 25ml lemon juice and 2tsps caster sugar and strain into a martini glass with a drop of cassis.

Skyy vodka is the vodka with the fewest impurities among leading vodkas with zero carbs. Sounds really healthy actually!

So girls going to London with me this weekend; I think this may be our drink. At least if we have an afternoon cocktail at Harvey Nichs where there is a collection of Sex and the City cocktail dresses to be visited.

Completed without any issues

The year-end audit is completed. Of the tenant-owner society that is. Once an auditor apparently always an auditor. I did my last 'real' audit more than ten years ago, but the technique is still there. My very first audit was also a tenant-owner society...

At least I'm impressing my famous actor neighbour. Or may be he is just being nice. If he is making parodies of auditors in his future sketches I will take some cred for providing the inspiration.

Ghost game and manicure

It wasn't just me enjoying last week's mini-weekend with niece and nephew, cinema and hide and seek. Through the grapevine I found out that my nephew, who is also my oldest godson, was keen to come back. A compliment from a child is worth its weight in gold. Also, it was comforting to find out that the little ghost game that we played hadn't left any visible scars.

Next weekend is dedicated to my oldest goddaughter. The hide and seek will be replaced by chatting, manicure and music. We bonded early over handbags, jewellery and shoes; she was a big fan since the age of one. She is thirteen this summer. Can't wait to see her and the rest of my English family!

Let's fall in love

Last weekend was the premier for coffee on the balcony. This weekend it was time for the first ice cream outdoors. Well deserved after a long walk in the sun, the three scopes of chocolate, strawberry and blueberry in a cone tasted of summer.

The GB Glace man is by the way in love. He probably caught the royal love bug in the general wedding hysteria (well at least one of the princesses is still getting married) so now there is a GB Glace woman too. And of course there is a royal ice cream for the occasion. Marketing at its best...

I'm still waiting for a touch of the bug. Hope I'm not immune!

Having an impact

The Globe was set in motion to the point where it almost took off. The moves, the body control, the creativity. Having just seen Bounce live in their final performance I still feel the beat.

But what impress me more than anything is how they really believe in what they do. Nothing is impossible. There seem to be few limits along the line "this is how we have always done things around here". They can really make a difference; have an impact. The Michael Jackson tribute is just one example.

And there is no doubt at all that they love what they do.

Three Musketeers on a mission

This pretty much sums up Friday night. The barman probably got a little bit more information than he needed.

How to save money

Suffering from the dutiful-good-girl-syndrome, I follow the manufacturer's recommended car maintenance schedule. This time I was actually even ahead of the recommendation (why?).

It's always a random exercise. I never know whether the party will end up in the range of £££ or £,£££. Collecting the car from the garage is therefore a complete surprise, and rarely pleasant. What have they found this time?

Well, today was my lucky day. Car is doing very well, proved by the reasonable bill kept at a minimum (well, at least according to Mr Mechanic and he knows as well as I do that I have no idea what to expect). So my savings today mean my shopping allowance at Rodebjer's sales tomorrow has increased dramatically. And then I will save even more. It's all very logical.

A blind date that lasted

The far best blind date I have ever been on was in 1998. We were both new in London and our procuress, alias childhood friend to me and colleague to my date, thought we would hit it off. So we made contact.

Being new to London, we didn't know better than to arrange our meeting at the exit gate at Earl's Court tube stop, one of the few familiar places we both knew. A very crowded spot for meeting someone you don't know and don't recognise. But there was no hesitation. We spotted each other immediately and the blind date started with a hug.

This was twelve year's ago and today I got one of those hugs again when I met her for lunch - a highlight on my otherwise not very glamorous worktrip.

Little Miss Happy. It doesn't matter that we have hardly spoken in the last couple of years, that there have been babies, relationships, new jobs and travels. We still fall into a familiar way of just being and picking up conversations where they are most relevant and needed, without having to backtrack to understand.

The successful blind date that turned into unconditional friendship.

Meditation in the leader's toolkit

Being present is a key leadership skill. To have the ability to listen. To focus. And to convey the right message at the right time to achieve the desired outcome.

What could be a better exercise to practice being present than a guided meditation? Just as a warm up before talking about the pitfalls, the techniques and the role models. So that's what I've been preparing today for sixteen unknowing participants joining the leadership programme in a couple of weeks' time.

It will be a first for me. To guide a group of upcoming leaders on how to still the mind for ten minutes. And hopefully trigger them to curiosity rather than scepticism. I know it works as I used to be one of the debunkers.

Reliable source

"You are what you dress...something something...So dress to kill!"

In my random zapping exercise, somehow this line got stuck in my mind. It's quite good when you think about it. Quoted from the complete works by Gossip Girl...

Power-suit-Monday or Bohemian-Chic-Monday? Have to decide who is my primary target. Anyway, red nails will act as lubricant for any weapon.

Hurdles and words

There is research showing that, when in a stressful situation, a woman's brain automatically dwells on memories of mistakes*. Very unhelpful really. What to do? Well, the advice is to be aware of this negative filter that we are born with and try to see the situation clearly and positively.

So there is a biological explanation to girls' lack of self confidence. No wonder female leaders are real super women as the hurdles to overcome when climbing the ladder are not just made up by society (read lack of equal opportunities), but there is biology to overcome too.

No, I wouldn't describe myself as a feminist. But may be the reason is linguistic rather than anything else as I have placed the word 'feminist' in the box containing words with negative twangs. 'Sophisticated', on the other hand, lives in the box of words with positive twangs...

*"How Remarkable Women Lead - The Breakthrough Model for Work and Life" by Joanna Barsh and Susi Cranston

Coffee-on-the-balcony-premier...

...wearing a down vest and a wrap. That is spring in Stockholm. Ten minutes later both the coffee and I were rather chilled so we reverted indoors. And now I'm admiring the newly planted flowers, clean clinker flooring and furniture from inside. Ah well.

Auntie treat

A Saturday afternoon in the company of niece and newphew, two large popcorns, litres of softdrinks and Dragon Trainer. Even I got into the vikings and dragons and the excitement when the hero finally got across the message that the dragons were actually quite friendly creatures, as long as they were not threatened. And once that was understood they all lived in harmony in one big happy family. Phew.

Cinema followed by card games and hide and seek. I found a number of new hiding places in my flat that I never considered before. Good to know should I ever need to hide from anyone. Bubble bath and bed. I could get used to this.

Fabulous PU

In London before turning thirty we used to call it a PU, short for Piss Up. It was expected that you organised a PU when you were promoted, passed an exam, left the firm or sometimes you just did it anyway.

It was a very easy concept whereby you booked a restricted area in a bar, put some money behind the counter and let friends and colleagues drink at your expense. To keep the tab running for longer we normally only allowed wine and beer and when the tab limit was reached, people were usually not pissed enough to stop drinking but continued at their own expense. A proper PU was usually finished off at the local Indian restaurant.

Yesterday Little B organised an updated and more sophisticated version of a PU. A lovely set up at the relaxed but still trendy local bar slash restaurant. A mix of people from all over, friends and colleagues, who have one thing in common - Little B.

If it's true, and I believe it is, that you are a reflection of your friends and equally your friends are reflections of you, then of course this evening could be nothing but sparkling, spontaneous and lighthearted. A flow of rosé and engaging conversations. Friends meeting new friends, knowing that soon we will meet again as this is not the first (or the last) time Little B has one of her much appreciated get togethers.

Little B - what would we do without you?

Meetings and energy

Meeting 1 - with favourite film producer and previous colleague alias retired partner at the global professional services firm. Give it some time to sink in and may be this is the beginning of a freelance career. Or may be that is just a very positive interpretation of a polite refusal. Anyway, energy up!

Meeting 2 - with present colleague alias key person trying to explain what I really do. And don't do. And clear up misunderstandings, drawing up lines of responsibilities, clarifying who makes the decisions. Etc. etc. etc. Energy down...

Meeting 3 - dinner with Beautiful J and Mix. Lovely new restaurant with cosmopolitan touch in Stockholm's relaxed quarters. An evening of delicious food and wine and conversations that really matter. Friends from years back will always be very special and I love them dearly. Energy levels reached the ceiling!

Temptations

I was very close to bringing this beauty home with me yesterday, but time ran out between meetings and dinner with the girls. And now I know that the same bag can be found in a variety of colours. May be not in Stockholm, but London is waiting. If the ash spewing has subsided in a couple of weeks time that is.

At least the beginning and the end was good

Highlights: Beginning the day with an hour's brisk walk along the canal. The fresh feeling of the morning sunshine waking up a city and a new day beginning. Finishing the day at Beautiful J's, crashing on the couch with a take out sushi in the presence of a two-and-a-half year old emerged in activities. Impossible to be anything but engaged.

Lowlights: Everything in between, i.e. work. Draining, consuming, negative. Isn't work supposed to be inspiring, creative, productive and fun? I convince myself that I need days like this to fuel the onward journey leading to other opportunities. When the time is right.

The importance of taking references

OK, this is a short extract of a CV I got. Now we are talking about serious stuff, i.e. dating CV, not work CV:
Age: 40
Height: 1,80 (5ft 11)
Profession: MSc Finance (later updated to Corporate Finance)

Reality (later confirmed by some googling)? Well...:
Age: 49
Height: 1,75 (5ft 9) tops
Profession: funnily enough Corporate Finance proved to be true

Maybe everything else was true to the littlest detail, I never stayed long enough to find out. But why for heavens sake lie about the first two obvious facts?

The reality took about ten seconds into the meeting to find out. Just to clarify that the facts were given by the person in question, so there is no doubt that the correct answers were available.

The point is not 40 or 49, 5ft 11 or 5ft 9. The point is the signal the perhaps seemingly trivial lie sends on personality, integrity, self image and self confidence. Pathetic really.

I'm not going on another blind date for a very long time. And if I for some unknown reason decide to change my mind in this, I've learned the lesson to take the references before the interview. A difference from work where I would normally call the reference as the final check.

So. To add to my previous list on basic dating behaviour: No lying or else vanish.

How is Kate?

All of a sudden I'm wondering how Kate Moss is doing. Not that I really know her, but she used to be so much more present in my life when I lived in London. There she was on every single magazine, be it InStyle, Elle, Grazia or Hello (which I only read at the hairdressers of course).

Well, I didn't have to wonder for very long as Kate is on the frontpage of British Vogue in April. But it shows that I have some catching up to do on my UK magazines as I had to go via the web to find out. I'm leading a hard life... Anyway, here she is. Stunning as ever.

Next thing I wonder is how she has managed to bribe gravity.

Culture chock

First nothing for months, then bang! Two movies and one exhibition in one weekend. Now loaded with a splendid performance by Colin Firth (gorgeous film), French songs à la Gainsbourg (left the cinema embraced by smoke and whiskey - and a Birkin bag urge) and paintings described in Cezanne terminology (not convinced).

The city is finally awake

Sitting on the stairs of the Royal Theatre, with a take out latte and sunglasses, watching people strolling by. Yeap. Stockholm has woken up from the longest hibernation ever. The only slightly annoying thing is the roadwork blocking the view just in front of the theatre, and just about everywhere in the city. All the roads seem to be in need of fixing. Royal wedding hysteria?

Be warned

The new road sign signalling 'shopping area'. Somehow I don't think the sign will be anywhere near contemporary fashion and design or the Swedish equivalent of Kings Road and Harvey Nichols (still trying to find these by the way, so a road sign would be really helpful).

No, my guess is that they got this sign wrong. It should be a triangle in yellow and red. I don't think the family shopping of electronics, socks in tenpack and big packs of tinned cans count as a desired shopping area. Rather a necessary evil.

Or is this the kind of shopping that you start enjoying when you have a family of five? Scary thought...

Being different

A quiet evening out in Stockholm's more bohemian quarters. Time to catch up, wind down and get into weekend mood. Conversations flowing from buying the perfect flat at the right price to new work possibilities. And the difficulties of finding dating objects. Or when you find them they have too many competing priorities which makes the love story into a slow motion film that you can't fast forward.

After our little bar area was invaded buy a very loud group of gay men (who by the way practiced snogging in public as if there was no tomorrow - a bit like Italians in their spas), we decided to take our pretty selves elsewhere. We lost Adorable to John Blund when Sweetest M and I decided to explore the bohemian quarters a bit further.

I don't know what it was - our handbags (may be expensive but very low profile), our make-up (discreet and natural of course), hair (??) or may be our searching gaze when we tried to grasp if this was a nice place to hang out on a Friday evening. The feeling of being different was obvious.

That's how Stockholm works. You move ten minutes in one direction and oups, the norm has changed. Subtle differences in outfits, style and even body language. All of a sudden we were different.

We decided that, yes, this was a nice place to hang out and, no, we were not staying. Tube back to our old, familiar local restaurant where we ended the evening with a large pot of tea!!

A world of possibilities

I had a very inspiring lunch with the 'big-industrial-company-HR director' who I have hijacked as my mentor. I don't think she minds. I think she sees how much I value her sound advice and thinking. May be new doors are about to open. May be I will stick in my head and have a look. And may be decide to enter. Or may be I will just keep it ajar and stay where I am.

Pat on the back...

...to me for getting up at six this morning and in spite of headache and sore calf muscles (yes, a reminder of yesterday's step class) I took my tired body and sleepy mind to the shala for mysore practice.

Things to be happy for on a Thursday

• No cavities and an upbeat 'Keep up the good work' from my spectacular dentist. She takes care of the whole family and we never stop talking about her appearance. Punk and posh mixed in some bizarre way, with heavy black eye make up and a fringe made into a funny little bird's nest. But she is good!

• Finally getting a section of a routine in the lunchtime step class. Concentration and hard work. And being able to watch and follow my sister standing in front of me, who could trot through the whole routine on light feet.
  
  
• An email from old friend E suggesting an escape from work and a long lunch. Even if I couldn't make it the idea still made me happy. (Note my commitment to the step class which took priority over lunch with E.)
  
  
• A call from very old friend F suggesting a drink at his hotel when he got in from the airport for his twentyfour hours business trip. Spontaneous and lovely as always.
  
  
• Cycling home in the rain being grateful it's not snowing.
  

Co-author?

One and a half hours into my annual appraisal meeting:
Boss: So, where do you see yourself in five to seven years?
Me: Oh, I'm a yoga teacher. Or may be I'm writing a book. I could also be the MD of a company...

As I put together the leader's toolkit and our guide for how to conduct annual appraisal meetings, the question shouldn't have come as a surprise, but somehow I was so in the moment that it did. And when I saw my boss making some notes about my aspirations I wondered how smart it was to be so honest...

Boss: Aha, writing a book. I've been thinking about that too...

So may be we will be writing a book together??

Office-hopping challenges

Added work responsibilities have resulted not only in more hours, but also in two new routes to work as some office-hopping is required. The routes in question provide two different challenges.

There is the glamorous route which involves passing all my favourite Swedish design clothes shops without entering. And then there is the less glamorous route to Gothenburg where the challenge is to make the travel time enjoyable and useful.

The trick to master the first challenge is to always have a tight meeting schedule and run slightly late. To arrive late to a meeting carrying a shopping bag from Filippa K or Whyred is not an option.

The second challenge is so far missing a satisfactory solution. I consider changing the plane to the train to have more uninterrupted time. This would also address spending unwanted time at Gothenburg airport. But what do you do when you get car sick on the fast train? Apparently a negative side effect of a good sense of balance.

The reality of being employed

A disadvantage of being employed is that sometimes you just have to accept a decision and realise that no matter how much you disagree with it and dislike it, it's going to happen anyway. And if you are not in, then you are out.

I had an afternoon to kick off the execution of a decision I strongly disagree with. I could feel my frustration grow, demonstrated by violent typing on the keyboard, increased sighing, tossing and turning on my chair. Just before the smoke started pouring out of my ears, one of my colleagues asked me if everything was alright. I had obviously given all the signs to demonstrate that it wasn't.

As asking the audience would only add to my frustration and 50/50 would still leave the wrong answers, I decided to call a friend.

My dear friend invited me to his office in the pretty suburb and that's where I landed twentyfive minutes later. He allowed me to let off steam clogged between my ears (previously interrupted by my considerate colleague), park the negative thoughts elsewhere and then we had a proper brainstorming meeting. I had finally snapped out of the downward spiral.

Lesson learned: when frustrated and negative, better leave the office to find new ideas in a more inspiring environment! And use one of your lifelines; it's worth it.

Passion for work

An evening at the Royal Opera. It's amazing how many people are involved: orchestra, choir, opera singers, ballet dancers... not to mention the light engineers, make up artists and costume technicians.

But my focus is on Beautiful J. With a damaged knee ligament she is still up there performing, knowing that the ligament is only seconds from giving up completely. And it's not an average peformance; it's amazing.

That's what I call passion for a profession, commitment to an ensemble, love of art and a fighting spirit that most office employees save for emergencies only (read fire, bomb threat or flooding). If everybody had the same passion, commitment and love for their profession the world would be a different place, of that I'm sure.

So what am I going to do differently tomorrow?

Spring is definitely here!

Easter quality time with my oldest godson

My oldest godson took me by surprise twice this Easter. The first time was when he said 'Yeees!!' when I asked him if he wanted to come for a walk in the forest. I usually don't stand a chance against the computer game.

Chatting away...
Godson: 'Which bird do you think is the prettiest bird?'
Me: Don't really like birds, but that is obviously the wrong answer right now so... the one with a big red chest...How about bullfinch?
Godson: 'Yeah... that's nice. I like woodpeckers!'

The walk continues. Hoping to see moose, deer and boar inspired by all the droppings...

Godson: 'Let's count all the animals we see in the forest! Ants don't count. And birds don't count either because they are too quick to be counted properly.'

An hour's walk resulted in one animal. A little ladybird. May be not much, but the nicest spring sign.

And the second surprise he gave me was when he knew exactly how old I am. I mean, I hardly know and he was spot on. It's a number I rarely use, and who cares about numbers anyway... His favourite topic (after PE) is maths. Figure that.

Souvenir from last autumn

Easter diet

This is perhaps not the right time of the year for 'get-ready-for-beach-10' diet, but why not a diet for the mind?

'Pure thoughts are the healthy diet for the mind. Creative thoughts are like vitamins.
Positive thoughts provide proteins that build will power, while thoughts of serving others are like carbohydrates, which provide energy for the mind.' (from thoughtoftoday.org.uk)

Conclusion: Keep eating those chocolate bunnies as long as your mind is full of creative, positive thinking.

Blog addiction

Six months ago I decided to do something about my naive and may be premature dream to write a book. The not so very serious attempt from three years ago ended up with a pile of notebooks still occupying my drawers.

I made a secret promise to myself to write something every day. To make it public (well, semipublic) and to evaluate after six months. The easiest, simplest and most accessible format I could think of was of course this.

There is still 23 days left to evaluate. But the practice so far has been good. With the side effect that I'm hooked on a number of blogs from people I have never met and probably never will meet. It's like peeping into somebody's window under cover of the darkness.